Monday, February 27, 2012

Happy Birthday to Me

Today is the day I turn 27 years old. Amazingly I feel no different than yesterday. I know, so very hard to believe. The couch is my friend today as I have made sure I was not scheduled for internship hours. I might just be sitting home by myself, but you better believe I am not going to sit bored in an office on my birthday. E will be home this evening and we will have dinner and go bowling, or at least that is the plan so far. Birthdays are my favorite holidays, for they encourage us to focus on celebrating one single person and showing them our love, yet I have always felt kind of strange about my own. Although, I must say, since E and I came into each others lives, my birthdays have been much better received and something I look forward to a little more than before.

Rather than show you gifts for myself, I'll show you a few of the gifts I have taken to accumulating for our unborn baby.

E and I have started a monthly date tradition, where each of us plans a date for the month. In January my date was an afternoon of painted pottery and pizza. That's where I created this little cardinal bank. My Mom always told me that "red birds bring surprises" and it is something I carry with me to this day. Each time I see a red wing fly past, I wonder what surprise there is in store for me. I plan on sharing this sentiment with our kids as well. So, this little bank was made especially for our first-born, painted with love and joy on a cold winter's afternoon in January.

It also has a little secret message on the bottom. This was painted at a time when we had just found out our news and it felt so daring and secretive to label this piece with "Mom", a title I will grow into within the next year.

These other little farm-themed goodies were purchased and tucked away before I even knew I was pregnant. Over new years holiday my sister and I traveled to a children's boutique to use a groupon on the brink of expiration, and though I had no groupon in hand, I left with these two little treasures. My life is most greatly influenced by the times I have spent in the country and my three months living and working on a farm sanctuary. These cotton creations may not bring me back to those times, but they sure do remind me of the life I want to live and the life I want to give our children. Plus, there is no denying they are adorable.

So here I am - 27 years old and with a life-changing year ahead of me. 74 days until graduation, 103 days until we are married, and 204 days until our babies due date. 27 will definitely not be boring.


Friday, February 24, 2012

A New Berry for the Bunch

I should come clean right away, that is the purpose of giving myself room to breathe, a main reason being the freedom to speak openly and release all of the thoughts that have been occupying my mind since finding out on January 10th, that this very year I will become a mother.

Yes, my wish has been granted, the stars have aligned, there is a human growing in my uterus. Wait, what? Yes, a human growing in my uterus. You know, it is one of those things you think of and dream of and imagine in all the ways you know how, but until it is happening, until it is real, there is no way to grasp the enormity of it all. This was very much planned for, desired, and anticipated, yet here we are and I am blown away by the emotions that visit me daily. My preoccupation with school, my current internship, and planning our small June wedding has kept me from fully grasping all that is happening, but it is very much real, very much amazing, and very freak-out inducing, all wrapped into one little growing fetus in my nether regions.

As of today our little skin critter is 10 weeks and 2 days. We are a quarter of the way there already, which is hard to believe. Imaging what will await us in 30 weeks, give or take, is enough to keep my mind busy until that very day, yet at the same time, just as I could not understand the feeling of pregnancy becoming a reality, holding our baby, a baby that combines the silly, strong, handsome fella I love and myself, looking at a little face that will witness all of my faults and my achievements, that part, that understanding, it will have to wait as well. We all have a lot of growing to do before that day and when it comes we may not know what we are in for, but we will be eager to jump in, expecting to come out with our own share of bumps and bruises as we travel along our own journey of parenthood.